


Comfortably Numb

by Etherthires



Category: DCU (Comics), Preacher (Comics), Preacher (TV)
Genre: Album: The Wall (Pink Floyd), Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst and Tragedy, Drug Abuse, Drug Use, F/M, Feminine Pronouns for Reader, Heavy Angst, Human/Vampire Relationship, One Shot, Pink Floyd References, Recreational Drug Use, References to Depression, Religious Discussion, Vampires, a lot of comic references btw, and this relationship is before Cass meets Jesse and Tulip, lots of references to pink floyd just because it felt perfect for the theme, this is literally just really sad shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-14
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-22 04:00:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,966
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30032700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Etherthires/pseuds/Etherthires
Summary: Also titled:Cheap Incense and Cigarette SmokeThe air smelled of a bad mixture of herbs and cannabis, cheap incense and cigarette smoke. The use of the herbs and incense were mostly a failed attempt to hide the overwhelming musk of the other combined smoke that stained the cheap Louisiana apartment’s decaying wallpaper. It appeared that the humid heat of summer didn't seem to particularly help the stench either, even with an open window the heat decided to rise and eventually stick within the shoddy unit. Of course, it was like this every summer since (Y/N) moved to New Orleans; though now she at least had someone to complain about the scent with.
Relationships: Proinsias Cassidy/Original Female Character(s), Proinsias Cassidy/Reader
Comments: 3
Kudos: 1





	Comfortably Numb

**Author's Note:**

> this idea came to me while i was trying to sleep after getting ~not sober~ and uhm. you can see where my brain is at the moment! :)  
> either way, i hope you enjoy it even though the preacher fanbase is long dead. warning for angst and SORTA implied drug abuse and implied addiction. and a lotta profanities
> 
> also, this fic is placed before Cassidy met Jesse and Tulip. probably sometime in the 90s. enjoy. 🤙
> 
> (Y/N): Your Name  
> (E/C): Eye Color

The air smelled of a bad mixture of herbs and cannabis, cheap incense and cigarette smoke. The use of the herbs and incense were mostly a failed attempt to hide the overwhelming musk of the other combined smoke that stained the cheap Louisiana apartment’s decaying wallpaper. It appeared that the humid heat of summer didn't seem to particularly help the stench either, even with an open window the heat decided to rise and eventually stick within the shoddy unit. Of course, it was like this every summer since (Y/N) moved to New Orleans; though now she at least had someone to complain about the scent _with—_ not that she or her “friend” would do anything to really _fix_ the scent, (in fact they moreso only made the scent stronger with their lack of maintenance and constant smoking)—but there was something fun about complaining about it with her relatively new companion. 

This companion was a man—or _vampire—_ that she had met one lively night on the town. When the woman wasn’t working at her deadend tourist-trap of a job, she would waste her time going to bars or random rock gigs around the city, with the latter of course being where she found the vampire. His name was Cassidy and he _claimed_ to be an 80-something year old vampire from Ireland. To say the least, even though she didn’t particularly believe the claim from the beginning, she did get along with the naturally charismatic Irishman from the moment their conversation sparked. Even with the blaring music of the amateurish concert, they couldn’t help but find a way to hook each other in with their complaints and gossip—and before they knew it, (Y/N) found the man naked in her bed the next morning. What followed afterwards was simple, they realized they had more in common than previously noticed, and their meetings became almost daily. Most of the time, he would crash at her place during the day and spend his nights either with her or doing god-knows-what around the city. (Y/N) wasn’t clingy though, nor particularly jealous. She enjoyed Cassidy’s company in this shit-hole she called a life, and that was that.

Today, Cassidy woke up earlier than usual and (Y/N) had already made it home from work; which meant today was the perfect day to spend some time together. Few words were exchanged while she began to set up the living room, placing a “ _The Wall_ ” vinyl on the old, thrifted record player while Cassidy began to roll a blunt. She then threw on one of his wife-beaters and stripped down to her underwear; using her best technique to combat the humid heat of Louisiana. Of course, the Irishman would soon follow, finding himself in nothing but briefs despite not as obviously bothered by the temperature.

And not before long, he and the woman found themselves lounging on the couch, her hair sprawled out over his lap as they each took a hit of the blunt until there were nothing but ashes left to it. For a long few moments, they sat in blissful silence as the humidity wafted through the room, making the pungent scent all the more worse. But the pair didn’t mind much, their inebriated state kept them comfortable as their minds fixated on the music of the old vinyl. 

They were happy now, _low._ There wasn’t any fun little giggles or jokes made within the time of silence; there was simply Pink Floyd and the company of a loved one. It felt good to be in this state for a while—but there was always a _catch_ with this feeling. The sentiment (Y/N) felt, the _melancholy_ as “Don’t Leave Me Now” played over the speaker. Her mind began to wonder.

But unfortunately Cassidy’s mind was apparently elsewhere.

“I saw this in theater’s, ya know? I was trippin’ balls the whole time, forgot I was a bloody vampire and thought I had started ta’ hear voices. Finds out the people next ta’ me were havin’ the same problem too. Wouldn’tve traded that shite for the world.”

He chuckled at the nostalgic thought, his hand moving to rest comfortably at the top of her head, thin fingers combing through the humidity-soaked hair.  
The woman only made a sound of affirmation, seeming to be a little _too_ in her head to have a wholesome chat about his time in the 80s. Instead, her eyes avoided his gaze, that painfully melancholic yet empty stare finding itself fixated on the wall instead.

After another long period of silence between them, (E/C) eyes moved to meet the vampire’s behind his sunglasses, only a moment passing before he seemed to understand the situation. His hand moved to (Y/N)’s cheek then, raising a brow in a sad smile back to her.  
  
“What’s the matter, luv? Yer starin’ at me like a godfersaken puppy. It’s heartbreakin’.”  
  
Another short moment passed before she found the words to speak again—but Cassidy was patient. He’d be lying if said he hadn’t felt like this before either.

“A girl came up to me while I was drinking alone one night. Had blonde and brown hair. She was pretty—but a little skinny for my taste. Seemed panicky yet _angry_ —like she had a lotta problems she had to sort through. But she sought _me_ out. At first, I just thought she was some crazy fucker on drugs, especially with that _eyepatch_ … then she went and mentioned _you.”_  
  
The moment the Irishman heard about the eyepatch, already pale skin would grow white. It was obvious that (Y/N) knew she was talking about _Dee—_ and considering that was his _ex_ , he couldn’t imagine the kinda shit the woman might’ve said. 

“Aw _jaysus_ luv, I’m real sorry… whatever she said, it’s prolly true… but I’m a changed person. We all do awful shite. Mine was just _real_ awful.”

His free arm moved to the nook of his neck as he nervously diverted his gaze from hers. He’d gotten used to getting scolded at, so this wasn’t anything he couldn’t handle… that didn’t mean he didn’t hate it though.

Though… to his surprise, she didn’t move from his lap to begin yelling at him. His companion just continued to lay at his thighs, only offering a shrug.

“Meh. I was a lil surprised at first, but I got over it. Happened a while ago actually, I didn’t really feel the need to bring it up until now—and I still kinda don’t feel like I _needed_ to bring it up in the first place.”

A sigh left her lips before she began to speak again.

“I just… wanted to let you know it happened. And uh… that I don’t think I care, really. I kinda expected we’d be doomed from the start but… I just like you too much to care.”

“What’d ya mean “doomed from the start?” We got each other, don’t we?”

He seemed a bit heartbroken by the woman’s words, showing that same tenderness that made her fall for him in the first place.

“Hell, if it’s of any consolation, I _think_ I love ya.” 

(E/C) eyes drifted back onto his pained features, though even now it seemed he was trying to smile. Even when he was being the biggest wanker in the room, he was somehow always the most charming too. (Y/N) could really just look at that rugged, melancholic mug for hours.

“...”

Nonetheless, she would sigh at his words, dry lips pursing at the comment that _should’ve_ made her smile.

“That’s the problem, Cassidy. I _know_ I love you.”

“Th–That ain’t fair, (Y/N)… ya know what I meant.” 

The woman would then move her head from his lap, taking no hesitation to place an affectionate kiss on his lips in a sad attempt to bring that smile back. Cassidy would accept the kiss but nevertheless found himself with the faintest _tinge_ in his chest. He’d had this talk before, once back in the 80’s with a woman he wished he could’ve once called his wife. But of course, as it happened with most relationships in Cassidy’s life, they grew apart—both in a literal and figurative sense; she was growing old and he wasn’t growing at all—and eventually they went their own ways. 

Cassidy would think about her every so often, about the feelings he and the woman shared. Obviously, he didn’t want to have to deal with it again… but he was a lovesick, self-destructive idiot and more importantly, he was _immortal._ Meaning it was bound to happen again and again. He often wondered if maybe this was one of the ways God had decided to punish him for becoming an abomination—damning him to hell on earth and cursed to live through the same heartache until someone finally kills him or he decides to just off himself instead.

Nonetheless, the vampire couldn’t help but pull away despite the part of him _begging_ to just let her continue, to let them grope each other to the psychedelic tunes of Pink Floyd until they simply forgot about mortality and all the crazy shit surrounding it… but her words echoed through his mind, _just enough_ to ground him for the moment.

“Luv… what'd ya mean by that though? Doomed from the start? Yer worryin’ me a bit.”

Another heavy breath would leave her lips, wishing she could have just ignored the problem altogether. But it really wasn’t that easy—he was a vampire, a Nosferatu or whatever the fuck—and she was just a woman in Louisiana. No matter how she looked at the situation, things would fall apart someday.

“Just… ya know. It’s a little sad. You’re not good for me, I’m not good for you. Hell, I ain’t no shrink, but I think we’re only feeding each other destruction in this situation. We can’t be together forever, and I can tell you’re not the kinda person to “turn” any unlucky fucks for his own selfishness… so it’s just kinda waiting on a timebomb at this point.”  
  
Cassidy would wince once more at the painfully accurate words, each of them clawing open memories from past loved ones, _friends;_ so many of which were now just rotting pieces of flesh in retirement homes. 

“But even so I… I think I don’t care? Or at least… I think I’d rather just live in the now. With shitty you, my shitty job, and shitty Louisiana. I think I love you that much, Cassidy.”

The Irishman was caught off guard by her words, his expression twisting and turning behind the dark lenses of his sunglasses. Her words _hurt,_ but _fuck_ he needed to hear them… 

And eventually, a smile managed to make its way back onto his lips. 

“And you know, there’s something interesting about dating a vampire. Makes you feel like anything else could happen. Makes you wonder if there really _is_ a God… and maybe he _did_ bring us together, you know? I’m not into all that Christian stuff, I’d way prefer worrying about the stars and shit… but I can’t help but wonder.”

(Y/N) smiled back at him, placing a soft kiss on his stubbly jawline before falling back into his lap. It seemed as though the high had worn off for both parties; and while the conversation left a semblance of melancholy in the air, it was obvious that the pair now had a stronger understanding of the road ahead of them. An empathetic grin remaining on each of their dry lips as Cassidy’s hand once again made its way back to the woman’s scalp, slowly raking his fingers through the heat-induced mess that was her hair.

“I really hope yer right about all that, darlin’.” 


End file.
